Are You Disconnected or Connected in our Relationship?

Are You Disconnected or Connected in Your Relationship?

Posted on 20. Jan, 2010 by ChiroPam in Relationships

Relationship - Are you Disconnected or Connected In more than 66 per cent of relationships that end because the female ends it, the male says that he had no idea there was a big problem in the relationship. That’s a pretty startling number. And most of the women in those relationships would say that they tried to communicate, tried to improve things, and eventually gave up. Whether you’re male or female, if you’re in a relationship you might want to ask yourself, “Am I currently connected or disconnected from my partner?

Relationships have periods where things feel effortless and other periods where they truly are hard work, regardless of whether you’ve been together for a few weeks or for several years. But relationships also have periods of disconnect, when couples tend to just be going through motions. These periods can be dangerous if left unchecked for too long.

Being In-Tune

Being tuned in to where your partner is at in their life is important and by staying in tune with them, you reduce the element of surprise in terms of serious threats to that relationship. Unless your partner is deceitful you should know where you stand with them. You should work toward being able to gage what type of period your relationship is currently in. While the relationship will have both peaks as well as valleys, it’s important to try to stay connected to what your partner is feeling and dealing with as well as to keep them in tune with how you are feeling.

Relationship Peaks and Valleys

Not all valleys are threats. Your life, exclusive of the relationship you’re in, will have peaks and valleys too. Sometimes you’ll need to be more nurturing of your partner and at times, you’ll hope that they’re more nurturing toward you. If your relationship has a long valley period due to things going on in your personal life like your job or your kids, you risk becoming disconnected with your partner and that’s where irreparable trouble can often start.

Helpful tips for staying connected include:

Listening. Your partner needs to be heard, just as much as you need to speak.
Take time for each other. Even if you go for a coffee or have a date night once a week, it’s important to make time to be a couple and nurture one another.
Give your partner space when they need it. Being in tune doesn’t require suffocation.
Learn about your partner’s archetypes (personality traits) for help with this.

More about Archetypes and Relationships

Do you know your partner really well? Being in tune with them might not always require verbal communication. Learning about their archetypes can help you not only be better in tune with their wants and needs but you can also use this information to improve communication in your marriage. Learn more about archetypes and check out Katie Todd’s TV episode on Ending a Marriage and Finding a Male Role Model.